Categorized | Parenting, Parenting Tips

How To Stop Parental Alienation

Nothing is more painful than having a child who was once close to you become so distant because of the deliberate negative influence of an ex-spouse. This is a very difficult challenge any parent can face but thankfully, there are steps that can be taken on how to stop parental alienation.

What Is Parental Alienation?

Parental Alienation (PA), also known as Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) is a disorder wherein a child rejects a parent the child once loved. This is often common to children with parents who are in the middle of a divorce or involved in a custody battle. Parental alienation is a form of brainwashing wherein one parent consciously causes a child to turn against the other parent.
Parental alienation can lead to the child hating, disrespecting, being apathetic and refusing to see the other parent which can completely abolish parent-child relationship.

How Can You Stop Parental Alienation?

Stop Trying To Rationalize

One common method on how to stop parental alienation is to reason with the child, with the alienating parent or both. However, this method is usually ineffective. Why? Rationalizing with the child or the alienating parent will only force the other parent to try harder and will most likely result to confrontations, making the situation worse than it already is. You might become so frustrated with your toddler’s indifference that you will lose your temper. When you lose your temper, there is a bigger possibility that the alienating parent will seek court orders and accuse you of child abuse.

Remain Calm

Keeping one’s calm is one of the most important tips on how to stop parental alienation. Try your best to keep a level head and stay in control even if you are about to explode or when you feel you have been wronged.

Be Present

Disappearing may be the easiest route to take when a child is so difficult to get through to. However, it is very essential that you remain by your toddler’s side even if your toddler refuses you. Be present and follow the visitation schedule to a T.

Continue Being A Parent

Another way how to stop parental alienation is to keep being a parent to the toddler. Be consistent and affectionate. Make sure you are firm in your expectations of your toddler. Do not give in or overlook your toddler’s inappropriate behaviour just because you feel pressured.

Bond With Your Toddler

Focus on having fun with your toddler instead of talking about the situation or convincing your toddler to change his mind. Read books and play together. Look at family photo albums or reminisce the good times. Eat at your toddler’s favorite restaurant. Do things you both enjoyed doing together to help your toddler remember the memories the two of you have made. Most importantly, let your toddler know you love him very much.

Do Not Say Anything Negative About The Alienating Parent

You may be angry with the alienating parent, but never say anything bad about the other parent especially when your toddler is around. Continue treating the alienating parent with respect or at least be civil even if you are provoked. This is an effective way to show to your toddler that you do not wish your toddler and the other parent harm.

Avoid Blaming Your Toddler

It is okay to reprimand your toddler’s bad behaviour but never blame your toddler for what is happening. Keep in mind that it is not your toddler’s fault. The problem is between you and the alienating parent. Keep the issue between you and the other parent. Your toddler is the worst victim of parental alienation and is most likely to incur long-term emotional damage.

Do Not Be Intimidated

Do not feel frightened with the alienating parent. This limits the power the alienating parent has. When you show you are intimidated with the alienating parent, the more the parent is stimulated to bully and terrorize you.

Stop Negotiating

In addition, do not negotiate with the alienating parent. Alienating parents are not interested in any form of settlement since they will not consider any compromises.

Find Therapy For Your Toddler

You can also seek therapy for your toddler to stop parental alienation. Getting expert help is a very effective method to help your child gain support during this trying time.

Parental alienation is a terrible and hurting experience for any parent. It gives no guarantee that your efforts will be successful but you should never give up in making your child feel loved.

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