Tag Archive | "adopted children"

Raising An Adopted Child

Change is hard for anyone. However, toddlers can have difficulty dealing with changes in their lives especially if it is as major as being adopted by new parents. Knowing the keys in raising an adopted child will help make the toddler’s adjustment easier.

Give A Warm Welcome

Prior to the arrival of your adopted child, arrange the child’s bedroom and lay things out such as bedding and clothes. Create a “Welcome Book” to illustrate who is in your family – mom, dad, brother, sister and even Jack the parrot. Do not forget to include the toddler’s picture. Prepare a plate of treats such as brownies or cookies on the kitchen countertop for the two of you to enjoy. Hold his hand as you show him the chair that is all his at the dining table. These gestures will make your home warm and your adopted child more at ease.

Provide The Toddler Something Familiar

Surround your toddler with something familiar. Place pictures of familiar faces on his bedside table. If he brought a favorite stuffed animal or blanket with him, let him keep it. Comfort items or loveys provide toddlers some security in a new environment.

Establish A Routine

Raising an adopted child requires structure. Structure is imperative for toddlers to grow and function. A daily routine will provide reassurance and ease anxieties. This is very important for an adopted toddler whose life has been turned upside down. Set a time for meals, snacks and play. Come up with a bedtime routine where you can help your toddler take a bath, get into his pajamas, read a story and kiss him goodnight. See to it you stick with this routine to create consistency. This can help the adopted child feel safe since he can predict what will happen next.

Explain Rules

Letting a toddler know what is expected of him is very crucial in the success of raising an adopted child. Discuss family rules, what behaviours are acceptable and unacceptable and consequences. Give him a list of chores he has to do. But, do not expect faultless behaviour or total obedience to your rules. Make him aware of his misbehaviour but do not scold or spank the toddler. Talk to him in a calm and firm manner. Give him a time-out or withhold a privilege. Doing this will help the toddler understand that rules are rules without feeling like he has to earn your love.

Allow The Toddler To Make Decisions

Raising an adopted child includes letting him make choices. Ask your adopted child what activities he wants to do, what food he wants to eat or where he wants to go over the weekend. This is a nice way to make him feel part of the family and provides an opportunity to get to know family members better.

Make Yourself Available

Be there for your toddler. Respond to his needs. Talk about everything. Make it clear to your child that you are always available to listen. Say you are happy when you see him smile. If he cries because he remembered something uneventful from his past, empathize with your toddler. Snuggle and give him a hug. The more secure your toddler feels, the more comfortable he will be with you which reduces any angst or hesitation he may have.

Raising an adopted child requires time, effort, patience and plenty of love. Having a new family is something an adopted child has to process. But remember, that children thrive best in families, and eventually, your toddler will adjust to his new environment and grow.

Posted in Parenting, Step ParentingComments (0)

  1. We welcome any feedback, questions or comments


April 2015
« May