Feelings of guilt are natural in parenting. But, it will not do you or your child any good. Fortunately, there are methods you can follow on how to discipline a toddler that will not leave you feeling guilty.
Set Rules and Stick To Them
Just like everyone else, children need boundaries. Talk to your toddler about your rules. Make him understand them clearly. For instance, do not just say “You are not allowed to open the front door.”. You have to explain to him the possible dangers he will face once he goes out of the house on his own. It is very important that you are consistent in your discipline. Do not put your toddler on a time-out for pulling his sister’s hair and then disregard the same behaviour the next. If he knows what to expect from you, not only will he be less likely to misbehave but you will not feel so guilty when he does and when giving him a consequence.
Give Yourself A Time-out
It is very common for parents to start yelling when their children are unruly and then feel awful about it afterward. Whenever you are angry at your toddler, take a break, count to ten or go outside and come back when you have calmed down. Having a clear mind helps you make good decisions when disciplining your toddler and you are less tempted to react in a way that can hurt or frighten your toddler (e.g. spanking, using bad words).
Ignore It
Learn how to pick your battles. All too often, toddlers misbehave not because they are being rowdy but because they want to exercise their freedom. Choose not to get mad over small issues. Ignoring the tantrum or misbehaviour is the best way to discipline a toddler without the guilt, especially if you are in public. Just let it go and eventually, your little one will stop whatever he is doing once he realizes you will not give him any attention.
Cut Your Toddler Some Slack
Say “no” every time and your toddler will see you as a mean mommy. If your toddler threw his peas because he does not like his food, control yourself from reprimanding him. Let him have his way sometimes. After all, your child needs to make mistakes so he can learn what behaviours are acceptable and unacceptable. Plus, always telling your toddler what to do will only leave you feeling guilty.
Keep It Fun
You do not have to be strict to make your toddler obey you. Look for creative ways to enforce rules. For instance, if your toddler does not want to brush his teeth or make his bed, turn it into a game by setting an egg timer and tell him the target is to complete his task before the timer goes off.
Recognize Good Behaviour
Whenever your toddler behaves or does something good, provide positive reinforcement. If your little one cleaned his room without being asked, do not just praise and say “You did a good job honey! Mommy is going to buy you a new toy.”, but encourage - “That was so kind of you. Thank you baby!”. The latter gives encouragement to repeat the behaviour without expecting any reward.
Guilt-free discipline will make things much easier for you and your child. It will help your toddler misbehave a lot less and regain your proper train of thought.